John Ekdahl sounds the alarm: highly principled, anti-war Hollywood celebrities are missing and we fear the worst

Writing at BuzzFeed, John Ekdhal is worried about our anti-war celebrities, but fortunately has not yet begun to panic. Won't you please help us locate the missing?

Our government is yet again marching us towards a war of choice in the Middle East and our non-partisan, peace-loving celebrities have gone missing since late 2008. We fear the worst.

The only explanation for their continued silence must be a large, organized kidnapping. To whoever is responsible for their disappearance, please post pictures of them holding a recent newspaper so we know they’re okay.

Hackneyed, but true: read the whole thing.

Prepare to have your Hypocrisy-Meter shattered.